Category Archives: BiPolar

RETRO ACTIVE≡SPECTIVE: Liquid Time A to Z Blogging Challenge 2021

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A to Z Blogging Challenge 2021

RETRO ACTIVE≡SPECTIVE

LIQUID TIME

“Time flies over us, but leaves its shadow behind.” Nathaniel Hawthorne

JANICULUM

elsEwhen ∞

Z is drawn back to Janiculum

V is drawn back to Janiculum

Timelessly

Flawless, pristine

War ravaged, wasteland

The Gates of Prógramma Spoudón

Open, barred, derelict

The streets, the homes, the shops, the temple

Upright, tumbled

Green, rocky terrain to the spires

Decomposing back to green

Merged (ZV) or apart (Z) (V)

To Janiculum they come

This Moment, among many many many

their presences announce themselves
there, now together
they're flowing into the others arms
hugging, stroking, tender
cheeks, napes, torsos
the lips, the lips
fingers glide along protein rich strands of keratin
lengths, volumes, grow to moods
all for the other
the want
the need
the caresses'
the hunger
the anger
forgiveness
understanding
accepting
tactile, stimulations
deeper, horridly,
gasps, roars,
trembling, quaking, shudders
breath
remember to
they hold each other/themself
the mantle of the goddess Alcyeyx is restored
Janiculum passed around (ZV)
sending ripples
sending ripples

sending

KHRONOS, aware

feels the audacious usurpers

takes in the arrogance

their nescient control of power

(ZV) are not comparable to the Gods

The Titian rises

End of the 2nd Arc

The Final Arc begins tomorrow:

SIDEREAL PARADOX

COMMENTS & FEEDBACK ARE ALWAYS WELCOME

QUAIL, IN‽ : Liquid Time A to Z Blogging Challenge 2021

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QUAIL, IN‽

LIQUID TIME

Life isn’t a matter of milestones, but of moments.” ~ ~ Rose Kennedy

(ZV) withered

(Compositions + Substance) Bond

Broke

A rupture

Null unit { }

Z

V

Unjoined

The moment slipped out of their control





elsEwhen Z

anger anguish escalate/s/d to nth level extremes bringing a mind blankness overruled by the raging mixture of emotions Z had no awareness of the deaths the sundering caused in Z’s wake diseases transferred at rates unimaginable when all Z was brought to islands of quiet of peace of centering only to be jaunted into the swirls of destructive force to return to peace to seek out violence to destroy to quiet to all things detrimental all until Z challenged Khronos who slapped Z down rejected rejected snubbed erased until





elsEwhen V
V filtered through equations, all equations
Dispelling the soul freezing zemblanity
That washed over and through V
To return to equations, formulas,
Routine
While suffering this travesty of moments
That soothed, touched, cherished, ached
That itched, burned, chilled, ached
In a melody of high bliss
Counterbalanced by exquisite agony
An emotional/pragmatic overload
Where it all led to Khronos
Who had no sense of V
Draining V
until

JANICULUM CALLED TO THEM

PERIODS: Liquid Time A to Z Blogging Challenge 2021

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PERIODS

LIQUID TIME

“We should always allow some time to elapse, for time discloses the truth.” ~ ~ Seneca

elsEwhens upon elsEwhens

Where is a place/time/moment for the deep discussions for (ZV)

Who don’t need to discuss anything

Who know everything

There are no secrets

There can be no alteration of the past or future of the now

Paths taken, thought, thought into actions, one action where all are

Experienced, tasted, seen, felt, heard, thought

Concomitantly

All periods of anguish runs alongside the history they

Have shared/share

you knew what she was doing to me

no no 
I  I 


yes


(ZV) hurtles through all lives
minute degrees
from start to end 
periods
past
the ones that may/will occur
oblivion

(ZV) is volatile as one
hatred or loved
explosive or calm
connected or pushed away
it is rarely and
Or rules (ZV)
a gamut of conditions, places, beings

(ZV) an inner transition
they smash their own atoms

there is a fissure
a departure
Z sets forth
V stumbles away
they are separate for eons
that took a fraction of a fraction of a fraction of a...

it did not last long
it lasted an eternity

No, I didn’t forget to write yesterday. I did write.

What you read above was not what I originally wrote.

That’s gone.

I needed some space.

There’ll be Q posting a little later today

Hopefully back on track

So close to the end.

Never give up

Never surrender

ON – Ω – OFF: Liquid Time A to Z Blog Challenge 2021

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ON – Ω – OFF

LIQUID TIME

“Time isn’t the main thing. It’s the only thing.” ~ ~ Miles Davis

TRANSITION

Karen will think/thinks/have thought OH SHIT!

Dr. Karen Capri envisages/verbalizes those words in the seven languages she speaks/thinks fluently.

Dr Capri has/had/will have the connective process to acknowledge what is before her endlessly

She is clinically absorbing an infinite vocabulary of experience across layers

That have layers intersecting mirrored rows of layers

Karen feels the emotional spectrum pour out of her

Her thinking process goes limp

(ZV) is floating there

Now Valentina

Then Zehara

Z

Karen has hated them

Individually

Especially together

If she could, Karen would clench her teeth, growling

They had gotten in her way way too many times

They are in her way now

Sensations go misty

She tries to fight the violation

Karen fails in every single way, across every possibility

Z knows/knew what was done to her

V now knows what was done to Z

Not even a blink: Dr. Capri is peeled away

TRANSITION

LAB

FLOAT POD CONNE

Interred 
The leaded pod
Door sealed into one piece
Lies a howling, a wail, a shriek
A keening lament
A fragile cord

One not heard, never to be
Plight of one's destiny
Or not

GRB 080916C burst
K is undone

The scream continues

Ω

Hmmm…an interesting Saturday post.

Oh, it is Sunday, you say

Hmmm…oh, yes,

My apologies

Monday Comes with a P

COMMENTS & FEEDBACK ARE ALWAYS APPRECIATED

JANICULUM AT A JUNCTURE: Liquid Time A to Z Blog Challenge 2021

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JANICULUM AT A JUNCTURE

LIQUID TIME

“Time brings all things to pass.” ~ ~ Aeschylus

elsEwhen XI

Z ░ V

Z ▒ V

Z▓V

Z∞V

JANICULUM

The Goddess strode into Janiculum through the Gates of Prógramma Spoudón. Her long, unbound hair trailed, tendrils caressing those in her wake. The colors shifted with every other step, taking on the hues of the flowers of the land. Some colors came from other realities, yet none in her presence remarked on the uniqueness. Tall, shapely, skin of a golden-olive hue, caught each eye, young and old alike.

The city-state was festooned with garlands of the sweetest aroma of the scythed. Purple hued feathery fronds, strung through the masses of golds, reds, yellows, and blues. It had taken a harvest to adorn the Goddess Alcyeyx’s walk way to her temple.

Deep genuflections as she passed. The muddy streets stained the linen Himation the populace wore. None were concerned. Their Goddess had arrived. Cheers of “Bless the Winds. Bless the Seas” reverberated throughout. The surrounding mountains concurred in receding echo.

Omens of dire times to come were brushed away with Alcyeyx’s arrival. The Oracle of the Peak wailed her laments to deaf ears once the Goddess arrived. Submitting to the inevitable, the Oracle retreated before the Sun vanished into the ocean. She knew she would return. After.

Rituals were cast, wine flowed, the food was plentiful. Everything was carried to excess. Children with slightly bloated bellies lay fast asleep on straw, patches of grass, and the shorn gardens. They nestled in the land of dreams.

The wine was never ending. Alcyeyx bequeathed that to her people, her devotees, her sacrificial stream. The crowds grew raucous as the skies went black. Fights were few; love making was key. Other lands degraded their festivals, the obscene, to them, rendering of garments, the cries of passions, the coming of more children being placed.

All of those in Janiculum were lost in their revels, as was Alcyeyx. Many women of youth and of age tasted the Goddess’s lips, felt the strong soft gliding over their unadorned flesh. As many came to Alcyeyx as she went to her worshippers. All were left beyond sated.

Except.

Except Alcyeyx, whose inner turmoil, the two sides of her constantly clashing, left part of her drained as the other part was elated. This had been the way of things since their metamorphosis. Two strong essences tugged, one always angry, the other mad. Or so the Angry One crowed.

Ten times ten², or when counting ended, were the battles, the pleas, the promises…

Z always called V out on the promises. For a while after, things would subside.

The call of the winds at the ascending sun found Alcyeyx looking beyond the walls of this beloved stronghold. Janiculum was one of the few things they embraced. Yet, the need for elsEwhen called.

The Goddess lifted her arms, raised her chin, and felt the West Wind blow her hair East.

If anyone had been awake at this juncture, they would surely have noticed the golden-olive hued Kingfisher take to the skies and then…

Khione, Nymph of contempt and snow, took satisfaction in Alcyeyx’s leave-taking.

Now, it was Khione’s time to take.

TRANSITION

The Kingfisher squabbled with itself, as it phased into the void.

TALES OF TALE SPINNING

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©Edward Gorey

TALES OF TALE SPINNING

OR

The A to Z Epics, More or Less

I started Tale Spinning at the beginning of 2011 as an offshoot of BornStoryteller. The latter went more towards non-fiction, rants, comparisons, and observations. Tale Spinning: an experiment in creative writing was the space I needed.
Since then, I’ve gone through periods of both non-stop writing and those “dry” spells, where nothing inspired or motivated me.

Joining the A to Z Blogging Challenge in April 2011 was one of the smartest moves I’ve ever made. I’ve pushed my own boundaries over the ten years, always looking for that “challenge.” Taking risks is stimulating. A lot of what I write is expressing what is burning within me at the moment.

Which is probably why I have trouble continuing plunging into the worlds and characters I’ve built over the years. The roller-coaster upheaval of my life during these last ten years have jaggedly flowed from euphoric to complete and utter numbness. This isn’t a pity party. Just stating the facts, ma’am.

Many bloggers/writers I have “met along the way have become family. What is “Family is Chosen” for $2,000, Alex?” (Man, I miss Alex Trebek. Right now, I am Team Levar Burton to become the new host. Reading Jeopardy Rainbow!). It’d take me the rest of the day (it’s early here) to point you all out, but my thanks and love are hereby sent. I even met the woman I love writing these blog posts during that first A to Z. Present tense, even though we are not together anymore.

Shit happens.

Anyways.

List Time. In case, you know, want to read past (and present) A to Z attempts. Each set starts with A on April 1st of that year. There might be a few preceding posts/teases over the years as I tried out the new voice I was shooting for.

A TO Z POSTS

Here’s something not A to Z that I’d love to get your feedback/comments. I keep getting drawn back to it on an emotional/mental level, but have not added a thing to it in quite a while. These were written during the summer of 2011.

The Kitsune-Mochi and Fox Saga

ABSOLUTE 31,536,000: Liquid Time A to Z Blog Challenge, April 2021

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ABSOLUTE 31,536,000

LIQUID TIME

A to Z Blog Challenge 2021

YOU ARE THERE

There isn’t a map that points to where you are. There isn’t a Mall, Zoo, Amusement Park, Tactical Training Range, whatever. Do you need to know the exact spot you occupy? The exact moment in time? You’ve asked yourself, or others, “Why am I here?” It’s an unanswerable question. This isn’t peace during wartime. You are there, but you are not aware of that.

FLOAT POD

Z is not fixed.

Buoyed at 33.8889° C. The heptahydrate MgSO4·7H2O balances the interior gravity at approximately of 1.26. The FP (Float Pod) is sound proof, light proof, but not air proof. The Air Circulation System (ACS) brings in more air. Humidity often reaches 100%; there is alignment in the darkness. The temperature of the water is constant. The humidity levels off as eyes close.

Z fades into transcendental breathing.

The pod door shuts with a clang; the noise reverberates around the chamber. Z, already afloat, hands along sides. Both palms open, the backs of the hands are resting on top of the chemically infused water. The earplugs are NRR rated at 12dB.

Z is ready. Now. Always present in the Now. It never mattered when the Now came before, or after, the Now Z is part of. Or was, as Z slipped into the next Now. The next. Again.

Z lives each zeptosecond of existence. The why of here, there, now, folds into each other.

Z is approaching Transition. Z’s word for it. Not ours.

It will suffice.

TRANSITION

The door to the FP remains closed.

Z was/is/will be.

“Time is liquid. One moment is no more important than any other and all moments quickly run away.”

~Kurt Vonnegut

So, A.

Liquid Time.

B continues on April 2nd, 2021

Comments are always appreciated

Cold Hearted John Meadows

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My name is John Meadows, at least, that’s what it says on my birth certificate. At this moment, I’m not sure if that is even true.

I woke up in a bedroom. It was an unknown space. Except, as I lifted my head up off the pillow, I noticed a picture that looked familiar. I stood, walked over to it: it was flush with the wall. An outdoor moment in time. There was a man, and a woman. They held each other, big smiles on their faces.

The man leaned on a vast gnarled tree. Instead of branches, It looked as if seven tree trunks wound around each other, an abstract weave of latticework wood. The leaves were thick, a dark shade of green that looked almost like they were black. They hung over the couple like a frame.

The woman had her head resting on the man’s shoulder. His hair fell to his collar, so dark that at first, I thought it looked like it was cut out of the photo. Her hair was lighter, a mixture of golden brown and red. I remembered that it was called Auburn. I don’t know why I didn’t realize that at first. Yes, Auburn-haired, long, it fell down and over his chest, making his torso look like it disappeared as well.

The photo bothered me. Her eyes sparkled when the shot was taken. His eyes held little to no reflection. I looked. His didn’t, even with the sunlight spotlighting where they stood. Her eyes, the tilt of her head, her smile: there was life. He smiled, but it didn’t seem to reach his eyes. They were flat.

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a free-standing full-body mirror to my left. It stood at a tilt near white folding slat doors. I shuffled my way over to it. I could not remember what I looked like, nor who I was. Maybe, I thought, looking at the reflection, things would come into focus. My heart began to accelerate, chest tightening, and it was getting difficult to breathe. I hadn’t been aware of breathing before this. I was now.

Coming into full view, I felt my head had received something smashing into it. It hurt like hell. I had to touch my head. It felt like bone shattered. I checked. It felt solid. But the pain. It was like a steel bar was slammed against my forehead.

A steel bar? Why did I…no, more a bat? Baseball? No, no. A baseball. Yes, a baseball hurtling to me, not even registering that I needed to move, to duck, do something. But it was too fast. I was too slow. I was up, then nothing. It felt just like that, although I didn’t know why. I still don’t know why I felt that way when I stepped in front of the mirror.

Yes, I was the man in that photo, even though I did not remember that. It was clear upon viewing, my eyesight was waving, no floaters, no film distortion over the irises. I looked at myself in the mirror, then over to the photo. Goosebumps paraded across my spine.

Turning, I took in the rest of the room. White minimalism in paint and fabrics. Same with my pajama pants. I noticed, then, that I had no shirt on. A look in the mirror traveled down; before, I was solely intent only on my face. My chest was hairy but not matted. Three parallel deep pink scars ran from my left armpit to just past the bellybutton. An inny. They didn’t hurt as much as throb. Noticing them did not help my rapid breathing and heart rate.

The next moments are still a blur. I know I looked around: the place had been tidy when I awoke. Now, drawers, men’s clothing, papers littered the white. All the bed linen was on the floor. The sliding slat doors were open wide, showing a closet that was only half full. I took this all in, sitting on the floor, leaning against the bed. I felt something hard and looked down. I had a metal lockbox in my hands. My breathing shallowed, and I felt myself calm down to regular human beats. At least, what I thought were normal.

There was no lock to have to break into. The lid swung up with ease, showing the mound of papers it carried. I riffled through the envelopes, unfolded the various papers, and only stopped when I found a Birth Certificate. Mine, I have assumed, until someone tells me differently. 

My name is John Meadows.

If you are listening to this tape, then most likely I am dead. Or too far away for any meaning of living or dead is inconsequential. This is the story of what happened from that moment of waking, clueless to everything that had meaning to me. I know that the woman in the photo was Jean, my partner. I know she no longer…is here. Where? At this time, I still do not know how to answer that.

Whoever you are, whenever you are, do yourself and loved ones a favor.

Do not stand under the leaves of that massive, gnarled tree.

It is not the Tree of Life.

Grandfather Speaks

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1st Chime: Midnight approaches. I’ve prepared for the darkness, urging it to mask what is to come. What needs to be done. What will be.

2nd Chime: I sit in her favorite chair. I have never done that before. The dent of her body is etched into the fabric and padding. I do not fit.

3rd Chime: Time. Time is going too slow. It is out of my control if I ever had any. My palms are wet. A tiny rivulet streaks down my brow into my eyes. It burns.

4th Chime: I gasp. My mouth. It feels like I poured ground cinnamon into the chamber. I cough clouds of red.

5th Chime: Hurry. Hurry. I need to. No. Wait. I can’t. Wait.

6th & 7th Chime: My calves cramp. I hadn’t noticed my knees were jumping like pistons. It won’t obey me. It won’t stop.

8th Chime: All. It’s not well. Not. The walls are closing in. There is wailing from the floor, right under my planted soles.

9th & 10th Movement: I heard no chimes. I’m fixed on the second hand as he struggles for the next second. The grandfather is moving time on.

11Th Chime: My lips are cracked. As I use my tongue to sponge them, I get the taste of copper as it sweeps over the swollen bottom lip.

12th Chime: Here. It is here. The elevated heart rate hurts my rib cage. There is a sour smell surrounding me. It does not offend. I am dripping wet with perspiration. It is time. It is time. I reach over to the frazzled side table.

The grandfather clock ticks eleven more.

On the 12th tick, the gun barrel is in my mouth.

I…

 

 

<<<<<<<<<<     >>>>>>>>>>

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

I host a writing group on Saturday mornings: Daydreamers Write! Prompts & Challenges. The above was from the challenge prompt: Strange things happen when the Grandfather Clock speaks. The challenge: Coat your piece in MOOD. Write in First-person & the narrator is not reliable. If you can, use all five (six?) senses. Some wrote prose, some poetry, and then…

The picture is ©Eric Freitas. If you want to see more of his work, the link is attached to the picture. His work is amazing, and Eric works on commissions. Check his website. 

 

Daydreamers Write! Prompt & Challenges  is a virtual writers group. We meet every Saturday morning (EST) from 10:00 am to Noon. Two prompts (2nd one holds the challenge), writing, sharing, constructive feedback, all in that two-hour slot. What I love about keeping this virtual is that we have members from both coasts in the US, and one from London. 

Click on the link, sign up for a membership, and then find the date you’d like to join in. Please send in the RSVP that is attached to that day’s invite. 

Any questions? You can leave me a message on the MeetUp page or direct to organizerdaydreams@gmail.com

One – Thirteen – Eight

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Thirteen years

Separated by a day

Tear apart Autumn.

 

Leaves die,

Their true colors surfacing

Until they fall.

 

It all happened too fast

As slow as it went

Eight years the aftermath. 

 

Two held out

Eyelids close for the last time

Left much unanswered with regrets

 

Stick it out, alone

As ideation throws itself

Against membrane walls.

 

Silence instead of screams

Close lips, open eyes

The yelling of the past is past.

 

There is a disconnect

Rejections, Turned backs

As the darkness of the night

Seeps into the coming day

Hiding is opportune

When one day is like the next.